


all for a broken man

by doodlingstories



Series: no happy endings [1]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, F/M, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Marriage, Mild Sexual Content, POV Pepper Potts, Parent Tony Stark, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Weddings, endgame speculation because the movie isnt out yet, im not gonna tag all the avengers, lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-21
Updated: 2019-04-21
Packaged: 2020-01-23 03:39:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18541519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doodlingstories/pseuds/doodlingstories
Summary: His somber mood is casting a shadow over his features, and Pepper knows he’s not telling her the whole truth as to why he wants to get married so soon. So, she asks him, “Why?”She doesn’t expect an answer.He doesn’t give one.or; half the universe turns into dust, Tony grieves, the Avengers want to avenge, and Pepper watches it all unfold while going along with the flow





	all for a broken man

**Author's Note:**

> alternative title: the good side of things still fill me with melancholy 
> 
> before we get into this, i just wanted to say i wrote this around a year ago and never finished it BUT since endgame is here in literally just a few days, i thought i'd finish it and publish it before it's.. too late? idk. 
> 
> un-betaed as usual
> 
> enjoy

People are turning to dust around her, and she doesn’t know why. The first thing that pops into her head when she sees people crumble into nothingness is _Tony_. She should be ashamed to admit it, ashamed that her first thought is him, but finds it that she can’t be bothered with shame when people are dissipating around her. 

Pepper scrambles for her phone despite the fact that she knows he’s in space. Maybe, _just maybe_ , he’s back. Maybe he’ll be able to answer her call now. No lost signals, no lost calls.

(She knows that her hope is in vain, though. It doesn’t take just a few moments to return from the dark sky that loomed above.)

The call doesn’t go through. It just beeps and beeps, and the more she listens to the sound, the more she hates it.

Pepper nearly loses her composure, gets ready to throw her phone at the black wall before her. It’s a given that Pepper has never been one to lash out in anger.

(This isn’t anger, though. This is sadness, this is agony and this is love.) 

(Love for a man that loves the world more than he loves her.)

She’s already got her arms stretched out, phone in her hand, ready to throw her phone when suddenly her phone rings.

She immediately lowers her hand and answers; she doesn’t even bother looking at the callers ID.

“Tony?” she’s hopeful, too damn hopeful, because the voice that answers isn’t him.

It’s James Rhodes, “ _What?_ No, I’m sorry. It’s me, Pepper, it’s- you aren’t with him?”

Pepper’s lip begins to tremble at the realization that Tony was out there all alone with no friend to back him up, “I- no. I was- there was a wizard, with _Bruce_ , before New York got attacked and then… and then, Rhodey, everyone around me turned into dust, and I think I’m going crazy because Tony isn’t here, he’s- he got on the spaceship and-” 

“Pepper, calm down!” Rhodey tells her, clearly in distress himself. 

“I’m sorry, I’m just very-” she softly cries into the phone.

“It’s okay. I understand; but you have to remember, this is Tony we’re talking about. He always makes it out alright, doesn’t he?” 

Pepper doesn’t miss the slight tremble in James’ voice.

_Yes, he’s made it in the past (never unscathed, never without bruises). But what if this is his last time? His last dance? What then?_

Pepper has so much she wants to say. Instead, though, she just asks Rhodey, “Is there anything I can do?” 

She hears him sigh in a tone akin to relief, before he asks her, “How fast do you think you could get to Wakanda?”

  
  
  


Tony comes back to earth a few days after Pepper arrives in Wakanda. 

(When he arrives, her heart feels full, like it’s been revived after being dormant for too long.) 

He stumbles to get off the spaceship he’s on, and he’s supporting himself on a blue humanoid-like woman.

Pepper hears the Wakandan guards warning her from stepping forwards, but she pays them no mind.

“Tony,” she breathes out, reaching out for him. He’s alright. He’s here. He’s _home_.

“Pep…” he chokes out, reaching for her. She lets him fall into her, cradles him (or maybe it’s him that’s cradling her?), holds him closer than she’s ever done before. He’s shaking, and she feels it down to the root of her entire being. 

“What happened?” she murmurs into his hair, not letting him go. 

“ _Peter…_ Peter is-” he doesn’t cry, but Pepper can tell that he’s pretty damn close to doing so. It’s as if Tony hasn’t let himself feel anything up until now, as if he’s exploding, bursting emotions he just can’t contain anymore.  

By the time they’re inside the Wakandan palace, he’s completely silent.

She knows why he’s silent. Peter, his protegee, had crumbled into dust. Tony called him his protegee, but Pepper knew it was more than that.

(Sometimes, when Peter would stay over at the compound, he would rope Tony into domesticity. It looked good on Tony, acting like Pepper’s father once did.

She tried not to think about that too often.)

  
  
  


Tony quickly retreats after they have fixed up his wounds, and then asks kindly for a place where he can tinker. Pepper sees in between the lines, though. He might ask for a place to tinker, but he’s really looking for a place to drown his sorrows. 

Soon, after he retreats, Pepper hears the others discuss his silence; after all, it was in their eyes seldom to see Tony Stark with nothing to talk about.

(Pepper knew better, though. She knew _him_. His silence was unbearable, but never unusual. His silence was telling, but never unheard of.)

“The Man of Iron had a kid there with him - perhaps a son?” suggests the blue woman who had arrived with him. She speaks in a nonchalant tone, like she’s bored out of her mind and she’d rather be anywhere else. 

(Pepper knew better, though. She’d seen through the blue womans cracks, cracks that reminded Pepper so much of Tony that it ached.) 

“A son? No, I don’t think so… Stark doesn’t have any kids.” Another voice answers - Steve Rogers.

“He brought a fucking kid into this?” Clint, who had arrived around the same time as Pepper, is the next one to speak up in anger.

“I knew Tony to be reckless, but never to this extent.” A calm and collected Natasha speaks up, and her tone is as thoughtful and curious as ever.

“He’s always been too reckless for his own good,” grumbles Clint.

In the end, Pepper gets enough of listening to the fools who betrayed Tony talk about Tony behind his back. 

Her heels announce her arrival before her voice does, and it makes all heads in the living room turn towards her, “ _Enough_.”

“Miss Potts-”

“ _I said enough!_ I will not listen to you all talk about things you clearly know nothing about.”

“A kid, Miss Potts. He brought a fucking kid with him!” Clint barks.

Pepper answers coldly (yet oddly fondly, considering who she’s talking about), “I’m more than sure that the kid you are all discussing made that choice for himself. I know- _knew_ him, and he would always put others before him. Also, since you’re all so hellbent about talking about Tony, why don’t you just ask him yourself?”

She leaves the way she entered, the sound of her heels marking her departure.

  
  
  


An hour later, the Avengers call for a meeting. More specifically, they call for an inquiry. It’s painfully obvious that the meeting is about Tony’s supposed recklessness. 

Tony walks in with a fake enthusiastic attitude, and claps his hands together, “So, what’s on the agenda? Got a plan to kill the purple grape, finally? Has Nebula remembered a way to get everyone who was snapped back-”

“Actually, Stark, this is about something else.” Steve cuts in before Tony manages to ramble on about nothing. 

And so, they fire question after question, inquire and pry.

(Later, Pepper will realise that it’s the asking about things that they’re in no position to ask about that finally makes Tony snap at them.)

“Did you bring a kid with you?” Steve.

“I didn’t-”

“Why are you acting like you lost someone?” Clint.

“Because I-”

“Was he your son?” Blue woman. 

“He was-”

“Maybe he didn’t find out about his son until recently.” Natasha.

Clint snorts, “That would be just like-”

“Oh, for heaven's sake, you won’t even let Tony speak! How is he supposed to answer when you keep asking questions without getting your answers first?” Pepper hisses, effectively cutting everyone else off. 

Tony touches his nose briefly, and breathes out heavily, “Thank you, honey.” 

Steve raises an eyebrow, “I’m sorry. Begin with the first question, and go from there?”

He speaks softly, as if he cared about how Tony felt about everything. And maybe he did care, somewhere deep down.

But Pepper knew that at that moment he wasn’t speaking softly for Tony’s sake. He just wanted answers for his own selfish sake.

“I didn’t bring him with me. Not in the way you’re thinking. I told him to go back. Forced him, actually, with the help of FRIDAY. But he’s persistent,” Tony tells them all, speaking in such a low voice that it was just a little more than a mumble.

“And I did lose him. He wasn’t my son, but I-” 

Tony doesn’t say anything more after that. 

Pepper notices the way his hands tremble in tact with his lower lip. Pepper touches his hand to offer some comfort. 

Her touch doesn’t seem to help.

“He didn’t listen to me, alright? I told him to go, and he didn’t, and then he- he-” Tony takes a deep breath, shaking, shaking, _shaking_ , “ _End of story_." 

“No. No, not end of story, Stark. Because that still doesn’t change the fact that you let a kid fight the fight for you. Kids aren’t tools, aren’t just props for you to use whenever you feel like it.” Clint snarls, and that’s when Pepper sees what she should’ve seen much earlier. 

Clint lost his kids.

(Did he watch his kids turn to dust in front of him? Or did he simply call out their name, only to be met with silence and flecks of dust?) 

Tony places his head in his palm, and mutters angrily, “God, this is a waste of time,” 

“It’s not a-” Clint seethes, but Tony quickly cuts him off.

“It is! It fucking is, because I could also be wasting our time. I could waste my time telling you all I told you so, _I fucking told you so_ , because haven’t I been telling you all along that something was coming? But I won’t say that. I won’t rub it in. Wanna know why? _Because that isn’t important right now_. Half of the universe is gone. _Gone_. With the snap of a finger. And here you are, accusing me of putting _my kid_ in danger, when you should be looking at different ways to fix this mess,” Tony spits out venomously.

It doesn’t go amiss in the room when Tony slips up and says ‘my kid’. Flickers of understanding seem to go across the Avengers’ faces, as if the piece that were missing suddenly fell into place.

“Your kid? So he was your kid, then?” Clint’s anger dissipates, just like that.

Tony’s anger is replaced with nervousness and depression, “I- what? I didn’t say that. I said Peter. I meant Peter.” 

He looks horror-stricken at his own slip-up, and Pepper can practically feel the way he tries to fold in on himself.

“You never said Peter.” Steve says.

“Tones…” Rhodey says softly, a crease forming between his brows. 

“ _No_. No, this is- we are not discussing this right now.”

Pepper tries to ignore the raw hurt in Tony’s voice when he speaks. 

(She tries; tries and fails.) 

Her heart clenches, and her stomach does too, when she hears him broken like that. 

“You haven’t washed your hand.” Natasha suddenly notes. 

Tony tenses, and Pepper sees him visibly swallow, “And since when has my dirtiness bothered you, quadruple agent?” he snarks. The playful tone isn’t quite there. 

“I’m supposed to notice things, or did you forget?” she says with a raised brow. Tony stays quiet. 

“It’s grey, like ash,” she continues, observant as ever, “I’m assuming you were right next to him, when he disappeared?” 

The silence in the room suddenly feels far too heavy. 

“Right. Yeah- I- I held him,” Tony finally says with the slump of his shoulders, “I held him, and he- Peter-” 

Tony never finishes his sentence. Instead, he runs the cleanest hand down his face and stands up from the table to leave the room.

No one dares tell him that he has to stay.

Tony has his hand on the door handle when he stops right in his tracks. He turns his head, blinking back the tears that have been threatening to spill for days. 

“Something came up,” he lies, “gotta go.” 

Nobody believes the lie; but no one forces him to stay, either.

He leaves the room, and Pepper stays behind.

  
  
  


(“Miss Potts,” Peter had moaned, red of embarrassment, “this was a stupid idea. I never should’ve made him this stupid father’s day gift.”

“Oh? And why not?” Pepper had asked. 

“Because- because he isn’t my father!” he’d spluttered.

Pepper had hummed and glanced at him with a knowing twinkle in her gaze, “He’s as good as. Family doesn’t have to be blood, you know.” 

Peter kept quiet, after that. May wasn’t his blood either, so how was he supposed to argue against that?

Later that same evening, when Tony read the card that read ‘Happy Father’s Day!’, there shone a light in his eyes that Pepper had never seen before. 

 _Yes_ , Pepper had thought, _he’s as good as._ )

  
  
  


Later that evening, after the confrontation, Tony pulls her away from her work and says, “Let’s get married next week.” 

Pepper’s eyes widen, “I- _what?_ Tony, you can’t be serious! Half the world is-”

“ _I know_. Don’t you think I know that better than anyone? But maybe… maybe all we need is a little light in the dark… a little something to… to make things better. What do you say?”

His somber mood is casting a shadow over his features, and Pepper knows he’s not telling her the whole truth as to why he wants to get married so soon. So, she asks him, “Why?”

She doesn’t expect an answer.

He doesn’t give one.

  
  
  


Pepper says yes.

  
  
  


They get married a week later. She uses the old dress her mother had worn when she had gotten married, and wears a softer, yet still fierce makeup to match her attire.

There’s no one left to walk her down the aisle.

(That’s okay, though. She’s independent, always has been. Her marriage isn’t going to change that.) 

The doors open, and her eyes immediately fall upon Tony. 

Tony looks handsome up where he stands by the priest, clad in red and gold. He looks clean, tidy and ready; words she’d never used before to describe him.

(She tries to ignore the faint crease between his brows as she walks towards him.)

As she gets closer, Pepper sees tears falling down Tony’s cheeks when she walks down the aisle. It makes her heart beat faster, like it used to do when they were younger, when they were still dancing around their own feelings for one another. 

The wedding is small. It’s kind of inevitable, especially when half the world has turned to dust. 

Rhodey stands next to Tony as his best man, clad in a dark blue suit. 

(Black was too jarring after all the funerals they had been to, after all.)

Pepper’s best friend, Kat, had also turned to dust. And so, the only one close enough to Pepper to be her maid of honor was Happy. And, well, he wasn’t much of a maid of honor as he was a best man. _Man of honor_ , Tony had jokingly called him, making Happy grunt slightly in response.

(And isn’t it strange, strange that all the ones who remain are part of the original group, part of the original Avengers? Is this what destiny looks like?)

(No, Pepper decides. It is not strange nor is it destiny. It’s a tragedy, a tragedy in its fullest form.)

She takes her last steps towards where Tony is stood, and before he can stop her, she wipes away the tears that have fallen down his cheeks. 

Tony lets out a small laugh, “Fixing me up even on our wedding day. Never one to pass up a chance, are you?”

Pepper just smiles softly, traces her finger from his face to his arm to his hand. When her finger lands on his hand, he grabs her hand and squeezes it lightly before he lets go. 

The ceremony goes off without a hitch. They listen to the priest preach pompously, and when that is done and they have read their vows, they get told, “You may now kiss.”

Tony’s face lights up at the queue, perverted and innocent in a way only Tony can express.

He doesn't kiss her in an extravagant way, with a dip or a lift, like he’d threatened to do when the dusting was a thing of the future. He does it softly, with his hands cupping her face lightly. Pepper finds that she can’t do anything but reciprocate and melt into his kiss. 

The cheers from the crowds are few, but full. But the day isn’t about the crowds; it’s about them, broken and tarnished as they may be. 

And, really, being with him is all Pepper needs.

  
  
  


They’re swaying to the sound of the music, softly moving across the floor. His hands are firmly placed on her hips, hers around his neck. They’re chest to chest, and she can feel his uneven heartbeat against hers. 

The crease that had resided between his brows the entire day is explained when he lets out a silent sob.

“I’m sorry for- I just- I wish Peter were here.” 

“I know…” she kisses him softly on the cheek, holding him close, “I know…” 

(Pepper knows. She always knows.)

  
  
  


Their honeymoon isn’t spent like she’d envisioned all those months ago when he’d proposed.

She’d envisioned a trip to Bora Bora, or perhaps the Maldives, where they’d spend their days by the beach, and the nights in bed, tangled in the sheets.

Instead, it’s spent in Malibu, near where their first home had been. Pepper still manages to get surprised by Tony’s thoughtfulness sometimes, even after all these years. 

The days aren’t spent by the beach, despite its near proximity. Tony and Pepper spend the days inside, lounging on the couch, binging series and movies. It feels sort of domestic, their entire honeymoon, to do something normal couples do on the daily. 

(Domestic like Peter and Tony were before everything went to hell.) 

Maybe a little domesticity was all they needed, Pepper wonders. Their lives have, from the first time they met, been a whirlwind of unexpected events. 

(Events that tore and ripped them apart, piece by piece.) 

(They’re alright, though.) 

(They always were.)

 _Yes_ , Pepper concludes when she wakes up to Tony trying to make her an omelette, _domesticity is all we need right now._

  
  
  


The nights aren’t spent in their bedroom, either. Instead, they spend it mourning the loss of their loved ones. They tangle together on the large sofa, and Pepper isn’t entirely sure where she begins and where he ends in their tangled mess of limbs.

Some nights they stay silent. 

Most nights they tell each other stories.

She tells him about the time Kat had forgotten it was winter, so she had put the air conditioner on full blast. 

He tells her about the time Peter accidentally called him _dad_.

She tells him about the time her personal assistant Merelyn had called the grumpy old board-men assholes to their faces. 

He tells her about the time Peter had asked Tony if he wanted to meet Ben on the anniversary of his death. 

Back and forth they share their stories to remind each other that love is the biggest source of power there is.

  
  
  


(Thanos had won because of love, Thor had told Pepper. He had won because Loki had loved Thor; because Gamora had loved Nebula; because Wanda had loved Vision. She faintly remembers thinking in the aftermath of that conversation, _if that is what love can do to the entire universe, then I don’t wanna know what it can do to me._ )

  
  
  


It’s their last night in Malibu when Tony answers a question she had asked well over a week ago. 

It goes a little something like this:

They’re laying on the large couch in the living room. She begins tracing her finger up and down his arm, at first with no thought behind her act. Then, when she traces her other hand up along his thigh, she knows that her body is asking for something that her mind has been too preoccupied to catch up with. 

The finger that’s trailing up his arm ends up at the nape of Tony’s neck. She pulls him closer to her face, hoping that he’ll take the hint. He catches on immediately, and kisses her zealously, taking his time to savour it.

“Bedroom?” he whispers against her lips.

“Yes.”

He doesn’t pick her up, like in the movies, nor does he press her up against the wall like a horny teenager.

Tony simply takes her hand and guides her to the bedroom. They have been together for years; they already know the motions like the back of their hands. 

They know each other's favorite spots to be touched, each other’s favorite spots to be held, each other's favorite positions to be in. 

Once they get to the bedroom, he pushes her on the bed the way she likes it and takes his time undressing.

They touch and touch, his calloused fingers contrasting Pepper’s smooth skin. They take it a little slower than usual. 

“Since it’s our honeymoon, I want to do it right,” he breathes against her breast, “They call it ‘making love’ or something ridiculous like that. I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of it-” Pepper snorts, “- but that’s what I’m thinking. Yes?”

She only nods in response, far too needy to actually get any words out. Pepper bring his face up and kisses him. She rolls them over so she’s the one on top, and straddles his lap, grinding down slightly. Then, just as he kisses her once more, when they’re both bare as can be, he abruptly stops. 

“I can’t.”

Tony looks crushed when admitting it, admitting that he can’t do what he is expected to do on a honeymoon. He even looks slightly ashamed.

She knows he’s expecting her to roll her eyes and tell him that he’s a man, he’s supposed to want this, to want her. 

(Howard had truly ruined Tony’s self esteem beyond repair. That’s okay, though; Pepper has always been pretty clear about her own thoughts and feelings. Setting the record straight was a specialty of hers.) 

Here’s what Tony doesn’t know; Pepper gets why he doesn’t want to have sex, and she can’t say she doesn’t feel the same way. They’re on the same wavelength more often than not these days.

Had it really been only a few years ago, when they had decided to pick up a fight all the while Vanko attacked them with his electric whips? Had it really only been a few years ago, when she had yelled at him while he was inhaling oxygen from a mask? Had it really been only a few years ago, when she had argued with him on that rooftop right before their first kiss? 

It all seems so long ago. Their arguments had been so silly, back then. Pepper sincerely doubted they would ever fight like that again. Not after everything they’ve been through. 

(Not because they never disagreed on things anymore - but because the fire that had fueled their youth had begun to dwindling out into ash.) 

“It’s fine,” she reassures him, smiling softly. And she’s being honest. It is fine. Because she knows there has been something on his mind ever since the day he’d come back from space. 

(“ _Why?_ ” She had asked, not expecting an answer.)

He watches her get off of him, his eyes still following her as she lays down in the bed right next to him. Once she has gotten comfortable, he looks away from her and fixes his gaze towards the white ceiling.

(Silence had been her answer then, heavy and rough like it usually was with Tony.) 

He’s still looking up at the ceiling when he says in a low voice, “He died in my arms.” 

Pepper doesn’t need to ask who he’s talking about to know it’s Peter.

(Pepper already knows. Pepper always knows.)

“I know. I remember you telling us all that.” she answers.

“Shit- I mean- he just…” Tony breathes out heavily, “He didn’t want to go, Pep. God. He didn’t want to- he wasn’t- it was hurting him. The- it took longer for him to go. And then he-” 

“What do you mean?” she asks confused by his nonsensical rambling.

“He could feel it, Pepper. He could feel himself crumbling, I know he could, I saw it, I- and then it took _so long_ before it happened. Not just a few seconds like with everyone else. And then he- he-”

He goes silent once more. Pepper knows Tony well enough that she knows she’s gonna have to push to get the whole story out, “What?” 

“He said he was sorry. _He said he was sorry_. How messed up is that? My kid, saying he is sorry because he was dying, crumbling away. Jesus Christ.”

They fall silent, and nothing more than their inhales and exhales can be heard throughout their room. 

“I can tell there’s something else you want to tell me.” Pepper mutters, pushing to get her answers. They both know that was the only way for Pepper to be able to help Tony, no matter how much it hurt to admit. 

He turns to look at her, eyes glazed over from tears that had yet to escape his eyes. 

Pepper grabs his hand, squeezes it lightly, and waits for him to tell. 

Tony exhales.

  
  
  


(In essence, it had gone a little something like this: 

Star Lord had taken his team aside to debrief them on the plan, and Peter had stayed with Tony and Doctor Strange. 

And then Peter had tugged slightly on his own arm, his fingers itching to tug on a sleeve of any kind. 

“Itchy, Pete?” Tony had asked.

“Huh?” Peter had answered.

“I’m asking if you’re itchy.” He’d repeated.

“Oh, uhm- no, not really…” Peter had scratched the back of his head, looking entirely too sheepish for Tony’s liking. The next words that came out of his mouth were so out of the left field that Tony hadn’t known how to respond.

“Not to impose or anything Mr. Stark, but… you should totally get married next week.”

“I- _what?!_ ” 

When Tony had asked him to explain himself, he hadn’t expected the reason to be something he resonated with. But then again, anything Peter Parker did made him question things he hadn’t before.

He had coughed, and then simply repeated himself, “You should get married. To Pepper. Next week.” 

But then he’d continued, and he’d told Tony his reasoning.

“That’s what May and Ben did… they weren’t married, see, ‘till my parents… y’know.”

“... why are you telling me this?”

“We aren’t all gonna survive this.” he’d said.

“That’s… awfully pessimistic of you.” 

“I’m being realistic, Mr. Stark. I’m not stupid. I knew what I was getting into when I stayed on that ship. Just… if someone we care about dies… promise me you’ll do it? Or, like, something similar. Doesn’t have to be marriage. A baby would be just as good, if not better.” 

Tony had huffed out a laugh… and then he’d promised.

What Tony didn’t tell Peter was that he had promised himself something, too. He had promised himself that Peter was going to get through the fight.

After he had dusted away in his hands, the broken promises echoed in his head, telling him he was a failure, failure,  _failure_.)

  
  
  


Tony lets out a shaky breath, “He told me… he told me his aunt and uncle did the same thing after his parents died. To lighten the mood after a tragedy. He told me that while life was full of hard times, everything was worth it for those golden moments in between.” 

Such a bright boy for such a young age. Brilliant wisdom and knowledge that no 16 year old should’ve held onto were the core of who Peter Parker was as a person.

They don’t get clothed after Tony’s tale. Instead they stay in bed, keeping each other close to hold onto the golden moment before the inevitable storm.

  
  
  


(The first time Pepper tried to tell Peter that he should wait a few years before joining Tony out on the field, he said only one word.

“No.”

She’d wanted to understand, so she’d asked him for an explanation.

“My uncle once told me that people with power, they… they’ve got this- this responsibility. Because if you can stop it, and then the bad things happen-” he’d said.

“- they happen because of you. I know. Tony told me.” she had finished, finally understanding the meaning behind those words. It sounded different when it came from Peter rather than Tony. 

“Then you get why I can’t stop doing this. I know you think I’m too young, and I know you think I’m too inexperienced. And maybe I am. But I have to do this. If I don’t… it won’t feel right.”

In that moment, Pepper saw a reflection of Tony in Peter’s eyes; only, it was something warmer. Something purer, more wholesome than Tony or Pepper could ever be. 

She’d told him that she understood and that she would be fine with it.

That was a lie, though. She’d never be fine with it. Forever fearing the loss of her loved ones would be something she’d never come to terms with.)

  
  
  


When they get back to the compound, the other Avengers seem to have found a way to bring everyone back. Nebula, it seems, knew more than they had originally thought. They also seem to have planned an attack on Thanos.

Tony hates the plan.

“Absolutely not. We’re not gonna risk any more lives than necessary.”

Steve runs a hand down his face, “It’s the only way-”

“Bullshit. I can think of a trillion other ways to defeat him.” Tony says with such determination that makes Pepper wonder why on earth Steve was elected leader of the Avengers all those years ago.

He tears apart their old plan, and begins planning a new one - a better one.

For the first time since the Avengers became a thing, they listen to Tony Stark without interrupting.

  
  
  


“I need your blessing. To do this.”

Tony asks for her blessing only three days after they have returned from their honeymoon.

She gives him a long, hard look. He has never asked for her blessing to save the world before. But she knows why he’s asking now - he’s afraid to lose her. They haven’t even been married for a month, and he’s already afraid she’s going to leave him.

“Okay.”

“Okay? Uh, is that a yes to my request or are you just acknowledging the fact that I need your blessing?”

Pepper gives him a small smile, “Okay, I’m giving you my blessing to do this suicide mission.”

After Pepper has given him her blessing, her hand unconsciously slides up to her stomach to feel the small bump that’s beginning to form.

**Author's Note:**

> this is a 3 parter, and it's all mostly finished, but beware - it's extremely angsty and sad
> 
> anyways, i hope you liked it lol


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